taxidermy & outdoors forum

Taxidermy talk, hunting and fishing talk
 
HomeHome  FAQFAQ  SearchSearch  RegisterRegister  MemberlistMemberlist  UsergroupsUsergroups  Log in  

Share | 
 

 The Drinking Snake

Go down 
AuthorMessage
jacktheknife



Posts : 18
Join date : 2007-09-12

PostSubject: The Drinking Snake   Sat Sep 22, 2007 12:14 pm

The story of the Drinking Snake

Severe Tramatic Brain Injury Rehab, 2001, there I was.
We were given work to do but unfortunately like every other class thing, the work was geared to the lowest common denominator.
Our therapist Louis would tell us to write a paper on something like what I did yesterday in rehab.” I would point out to him that we didn’t do anything worth writing about. We sit and stare at the wall and pick our nose all day, drool, fart. Louis! What is there to write about!
Give us something more interesting!
And Louis would say, “ Jack some of the people are Mexicans that don’t speak English that well, or not as well educated as you,
since it is a class we have to pick projects that are easy for everybody.

At that point me being a loner and it was beginning to be rather obvious why, I decided to pick my own subject.
I would write on whatever I wanted to.
{I mean whats he gona do, flunk me?}
I have it!
The story about a fishing trip I went on with a friend from grade school and his dad. Randy Gibson and his father old Harry were my friends since the 4th grade. Randy was the person who got me interested in hunting and fishing, trapping and the woods in general.
I met Randy as I said in the 4th grade.
Another friend Greg Cook told me in the hall between classes, at Mark Twain elementary school,
{Greg was kind of snotty nosed}
Hack Hoonier!
He said in the hall one day,
" I know a kid who has three B.B. guns! "
And that was news to a fourth grader back then!
Three guns!
To me this was incredible!
We went over to his house after school on our bicycles.
And he not only had three of his older brothers B.B. guns,
Randy had traps!
Cages
lived right by the woods.
I had made a friend for life!
And his father, old Harry, took us hunting many times. He would take us to the cedar crest viaduct a bridge over the Trinity River. He would sit in his car and Randy and I would hunt with our pellet guns, and later our .22’s or our shotguns. All day on Saturday we would roam the woods, and hunt rabbits, squirrels, pigeons, shoot old bottles and generally just be kids.
We were grown up and could drive now and as Harry was getting older and Randy and I were determined to show old Harry a good time so we decided to go fishing.
I knew of a pond down by Hillsboro,
the Doctors Pond as we called it.
The Doctors Pond was owned by some doctor who lived in California and we knew no one cared if we fished there.
One day Randy, old Harry and I drove down to the Doctors Pond and got the john boat out of his truck and launched it.

We started fishing and were doing good till we began to run out of bait.
I volunteered to go and look for some bait so Randy dropped me off at the bank and he and his dad kept fishing.
It was early in the spring and there was not much bait to be found.
I turned over a few old rotten logs and found some grubs. I was not doing well and was about to give up when I saw over on the other side of this slew a frog!
I got pretty excited because a frog was enough to keep us fishing the rest of the day. I needed a stick to help me keep my footing crossing the slew and found one. About six feet long and straight enough, so I started wading over to the other side.
About half way across I noticed a snake swimming in the slew in the same direction as the frog! Soon I realized the snake and I were after the same thing, the frog!
I hurried up and tried to cross over ahead of the snake but the snake beat me to it and started swallowing the frog whole!
I got to the other side and slipped the stick under the snake and flipped him up on the bank, walked up to him, put my foot on him, picked him up by the neck and choked that frog out of him, put it in my pocket.
I looked the snake in the eyes, medium sized water snake,
took my flask of Scnapps out and took myself a drink.
Then poured the snake what I figured was a belly full,
sort of as a consolation prize,
I knew it was not as good as a whole frog,
it wouldn’t fill his belly, but it would make him feel better.

Then I threw the snake back in the slough and went back to the slough where Randy and his dad were fishing and…
About that time my therapist Louis had somebody come in and had to talk to them, so he said Jack! I realized what he was going to say and at the last moment said “ AND THERE I WAS…” as I had an idea.

Louis said Jack hold it and I ‘ll be right back,
as soon as Louis took care of this opportune distraction,
I was pretending to be even more absent minded then I actually am. He said OK Jack sorry, go on. I stared at the floor, and scratched my chin, and seemed to be not remembering were I was. I said “I don’t have any idea what I was talking about” and turned behind me and said does anybody back there remember?

And as if on cue, Marty the dart cop said, uh… you said “and there I was,”
and I thought to myself {Perfect!}

Oh yeah! I got that story tellers gleam in my eye,
looking out at the horizon, paused, and started…
“There I was, surrounded, … by hoards… of howling savages!”
{gleam} so I { bending my elbow and putting my hand over my head and to the back of my neck, } Unsheathed my bowie knife! Held the imaginary foot long knife, point, up and down like I was feeling the weight.
Without looking back, flipped the knife perfectly catching it again behind my back and bringing it up to my mouth, saying “lets party” and spitting on the blade.
“And hacked my way!
Through a solid wall of human flesh! hah! hah! hah!”
Swallowing hard and gasping, panting and with my favorite crazy look in my eye, and adding after quickly looking down at my left arm as if to see if that canoe was there in my arm,
and pulling my arm up as if to be holding it.
“Dragging my canoe behind me!”
Gazing ahead in the distance.
Miss Cathy burst into a laughing fit, saying I remember that! I remember that!
I was 12 years old, and it was my birthday!
“I was 12 years old!!! I was 12!
I ain’t gona tell ya’ll how old I is.. but but.. but..
It was over 50 years ago!!!!

I went to the movie with my mom and all my friends,
and we saw that in some old movie!
It’s been over 50 years!
She couldn’t hardly breath she was laughing so hard.
That old white man! What’s his name? He was always drunk! Some old white man like left over from Vaudville!
:Marty the dart cop", said:
W.C.Fields.

And miss Cathy said That’s him!
It’s been over 50 years!
I still remember it.
Ha ha… “dragging my canoe behind me!”
Silence, bewilderment, and a confused stare….
And a long pause.
I was relishing this long pause!
I was thinking I’d show them how to tell a story,
after a while the class was getting nervous at the silence and they were beginning to talk among themselves.
I looked to the left at Louis, and he was naturally looking at me with a strange expression, “oh! I’m sorry! Wrong story! Wrong story!”

“And there I was,” I went on,
“standing on the bank as Randy and his dad paddled up in the boat.”
I got in and we cut the frog up for bait and kept on fishing.
We were doing pretty good, and old Harry was drunk by now and having such a good time!
The fishing trip was a success and everybody had a good time. It was getting late and the evening was beautiful. We were letting old Harry use most of the bait and we had a mess of fish, I became aware of a tapping on the boat. I realized I had been hearing it for a while but had not really noticed. {Tap bump} and I realized that we were in a grassland pond and there were no trees, no sticks on the shore or anything that could be floating in the water to make a sound like that. tap bump
I became curious and looked over the starboard beam and there was a snake!
“And I knew it was the same snake because it had a frog in his mouth!”
I couldn’t believe I was witnessing this!
“It was a profound display of intelligence from a mere reptile! A snake! And a young one at that, it was at most a year or two old! He was looking me right in the eyes! He knew just what he wanted! “He had gone right out and caught another frog, and swam out to out boat, probably the only boat that had ever been on that pond, he knew right where we were. And he had been beating that frog’s head on the side of our boat for 10-15 minutes! Trying to get out attention!” I felt bad, “I just didn’t snap.” Old Marty said beating the frog’s head on the boat! And I said well, “he was a snake! He didn’t have hands, or arms either! How was he to beat on the boat anyway? With his own head, and swimming with a one half pound frog in his mouth? Come on Marty!” I pretended to look down over the side of the ‘boat.’ “He was a smart little snake! Looking me right in the eye, Just a year or two old at most!” Louis was looking intently and had a curious expression on his face. “He wanted to trade!” And Louis got it and smiled.
“Yep he wanted him another drink!
Smart as a whip he was!
And a young one at that!”
The whole class was laughing now and it was a solid laugh!
It felt good!
I had pulled another one off!
Louis was saying ooohhh! Nnnoo! Shaking his head,
I don’t believe it!
Louis said, “ Jack, what’s the name of that story? The drinking snake?”
And I said, “It doesn’t have a name, but that’s about as good a name as any.”
Yep, a natural born storyteller I am,
I listened to the laughter and was still looking down over the side of the {boat} as the laughter was dying down.
I shook my head and said:
“yeah, I guess that snake would have kept us in frogs all night,
Pause,
and then said, you know, as long as the Scnapps held out.
”{laughter}
“And then, or unless the snake got too drunk and passed out!
”{laughter}
“ I would have liked to have taken that snake home for a pet,” Laughter. Long pause,
“But I didn’t have no pond.”

Marty the cop was laughing hard,
and said when he had calmed down
“ why didn’t you take the pond home too? Laughter! “I listened till he had laughed him self out,
and was quieting down, and threw in with a friendly manner,
“Come on, Marty, that’s kind of silly.” And he laughed at that too, good old Marty.


Jack the Knife

jacksknifeshop.tripod.com
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Matt (Administrator)
Admin
avatar

Posts : 79
Join date : 2007-09-10

PostSubject: Re: The Drinking Snake   Sat Sep 22, 2007 1:34 pm

You got some good stories knife.
Back to top Go down
View user profile http://hunt-fish-taxidermy.forumr.net
jacktheknife



Posts : 18
Join date : 2007-09-12

PostSubject: Re: The Drinking Snake   Sat Sep 22, 2007 4:32 pm

Thank you sir,


Knife
Back to top Go down
View user profile
Sponsored content




PostSubject: Re: The Drinking Snake   

Back to top Go down
 
The Drinking Snake
Back to top 
Page 1 of 1
 Similar topics
-
» Snake Venom
» (Spoof) Problem: Drinking Beer Along The Trails!
» The Official 606v2 6N Drinking Game
» Dad & Dave from Snake Gully (AUS) 23 Eps
» A Major snake alert has been issued in the Northern Territory

Permissions in this forum:You cannot reply to topics in this forum
taxidermy & outdoors forum :: Fishing Talk :: fishing talk-
Jump to: